Today My Molly Died
December 2nd, 2010
My dog Molly died today.
Molly was about to turn 17 next month and she certainly has lived a
wonderful and full life.
Yesterday it all began with seizures that lasted almost four hours. Thankfully I was home to be there for her. In the first hour, it was hard as I did not know it was happening because it was quiet and I heard nothing. As I went to check on what I thought was an odd noise, it was her, in a full seizure swaying back and forth in her own saliva across the kitchen floor. The back end of her body was halfway in the hallway as it had shown she had relieved herself as well. I quickly cleaned her up the best I could.
I cried. I just sat there holding her and holding her. I have been through this before but not so drastic as this one. The last one was awhile back and lasted only ten minutes and she came out of it with flying colors.
As time went on, so did the seizures. I kept praying when was it ever going to end. I knew if I did not watch her closely enough, she could swallow her tongue. I walked away for just a moment to get a dropper for water and some wash clothes and sure enough she went into a desperate, gagging, awful out of control seizure, which was her tongue being swallowed and she was choking. The absolute shaking from her body was sickening. I was determined not to allow that to happen so I picked her up and shook her shaking that tongue back out. It worked, but the seizure continued.
I kept her head up after that so it would not happen again, constantly wiping the flow of drool from her mouth. Thankfully I had some medications here at home to calm her. It took about a half hour but it worked,and the seizure finally passed.
A short time later she wanted up. I got her up and she actually walked around but right into the furniture and walls. I carried her outside and hung out with her in the grass as the sun set. She desperately tried to walk but it was hard. But if you knew Molly, she was determined not to die. She was the type of dog that followed me around the house no matter where I went. She felt certain she wasn't going to leave me now.
By evening the seizures began again and I gave her some more medication so she could get through the night. You see, I wanted her to die here at home, I had decided that long ago no matter how much she has failed in the past year.
She made it through the night as I checked on her constantly as she lay so quiet. I kept her fluids up with sugar water and she took that very well. I swear she never closed her eye once, only blinking, no matter what the time was. She knew something was wrong and she knew I was sad.
By the morning before the kids got up, I took her out again, this time for sunrise. I tried to get her to walk but she was bent and couldn't do it. She tried and tried for a few steps but then fell. She tried some more as she leaned up against me and walked. I know it's what she wanted because this time of year with the cold is her best time as she loved it so much.
By this time, I knew what I had to do. If she cannot walk or eat, I had told myself that I could not make her suffer, she needed to be put down. I left her to lay out in the sun for a short time as I went in to make some calls. Another thing she had always loved to do.
In the past I had already known I wanted to cremate her. I contacted Fuller Funeral Home with Pets at Peace and let a Brian Laurent know I was going to be there today. I had no vet yet to euthanize her and he suggested Dr. David Randall at the Big Cypress Veterinarian's office there on the east trail. Just a short distance from the Pets at Peace address.
As I arrived the whole staff, especially Dr.Randall was most supportive and was truly one of a kind doctor. I had never met him but it was well worth my visit, no matter how hard it was.
As Molly lay there ready to go, I held her and kissed her, reminding her how much I loved her and soon she will see Mandy and Maggy, her best buddies. I could almost see a glimmer in her eye as I said this, as she only had one eye.
When the doctor administered the drug, I held her some more as she became more relaxed. I laid my head on her chest and listened as her heart pumped until it stopped. It was 10:51 am this morning. It was over, I looked up and wished her well and said a prayer. I cried, this was so hard.
I took her with me to Pets at Peace where the man, Rick, helped me with her out of my van. I have never seen anything like this place. It was beautiful. It had a separate room for the showing of your pet with chairs, candles and tissues. We then placed her on this beautiful table, almost like an altar that was up front. A perfect ending for our last moments together.
Good bye Molly, I will miss you forever and I you will always be in my heart.
1/8/1994/-12/2/2010
Molly was about to turn 17 next month and she certainly has lived a
wonderful and full life.
Yesterday it all began with seizures that lasted almost four hours. Thankfully I was home to be there for her. In the first hour, it was hard as I did not know it was happening because it was quiet and I heard nothing. As I went to check on what I thought was an odd noise, it was her, in a full seizure swaying back and forth in her own saliva across the kitchen floor. The back end of her body was halfway in the hallway as it had shown she had relieved herself as well. I quickly cleaned her up the best I could.
I cried. I just sat there holding her and holding her. I have been through this before but not so drastic as this one. The last one was awhile back and lasted only ten minutes and she came out of it with flying colors.
As time went on, so did the seizures. I kept praying when was it ever going to end. I knew if I did not watch her closely enough, she could swallow her tongue. I walked away for just a moment to get a dropper for water and some wash clothes and sure enough she went into a desperate, gagging, awful out of control seizure, which was her tongue being swallowed and she was choking. The absolute shaking from her body was sickening. I was determined not to allow that to happen so I picked her up and shook her shaking that tongue back out. It worked, but the seizure continued.
I kept her head up after that so it would not happen again, constantly wiping the flow of drool from her mouth. Thankfully I had some medications here at home to calm her. It took about a half hour but it worked,and the seizure finally passed.
A short time later she wanted up. I got her up and she actually walked around but right into the furniture and walls. I carried her outside and hung out with her in the grass as the sun set. She desperately tried to walk but it was hard. But if you knew Molly, she was determined not to die. She was the type of dog that followed me around the house no matter where I went. She felt certain she wasn't going to leave me now.
By evening the seizures began again and I gave her some more medication so she could get through the night. You see, I wanted her to die here at home, I had decided that long ago no matter how much she has failed in the past year.
She made it through the night as I checked on her constantly as she lay so quiet. I kept her fluids up with sugar water and she took that very well. I swear she never closed her eye once, only blinking, no matter what the time was. She knew something was wrong and she knew I was sad.
By the morning before the kids got up, I took her out again, this time for sunrise. I tried to get her to walk but she was bent and couldn't do it. She tried and tried for a few steps but then fell. She tried some more as she leaned up against me and walked. I know it's what she wanted because this time of year with the cold is her best time as she loved it so much.
By this time, I knew what I had to do. If she cannot walk or eat, I had told myself that I could not make her suffer, she needed to be put down. I left her to lay out in the sun for a short time as I went in to make some calls. Another thing she had always loved to do.
In the past I had already known I wanted to cremate her. I contacted Fuller Funeral Home with Pets at Peace and let a Brian Laurent know I was going to be there today. I had no vet yet to euthanize her and he suggested Dr. David Randall at the Big Cypress Veterinarian's office there on the east trail. Just a short distance from the Pets at Peace address.
As I arrived the whole staff, especially Dr.Randall was most supportive and was truly one of a kind doctor. I had never met him but it was well worth my visit, no matter how hard it was.
As Molly lay there ready to go, I held her and kissed her, reminding her how much I loved her and soon she will see Mandy and Maggy, her best buddies. I could almost see a glimmer in her eye as I said this, as she only had one eye.
When the doctor administered the drug, I held her some more as she became more relaxed. I laid my head on her chest and listened as her heart pumped until it stopped. It was 10:51 am this morning. It was over, I looked up and wished her well and said a prayer. I cried, this was so hard.
I took her with me to Pets at Peace where the man, Rick, helped me with her out of my van. I have never seen anything like this place. It was beautiful. It had a separate room for the showing of your pet with chairs, candles and tissues. We then placed her on this beautiful table, almost like an altar that was up front. A perfect ending for our last moments together.
Good bye Molly, I will miss you forever and I you will always be in my heart.
1/8/1994/-12/2/2010
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